14 Things that you can't used a newspaper for

Name 14 things that a newspaper cannot used for:

- can't eat it
- can't drink it
- can't use it like a pen
- can't cook it
- you can't shower with it
- can't wash it
- can't ride it
- you cannot clean it
- can't sleep with it
- you can't use it as a helmet
- can't type on it
- cannot use it as a mop
- you can't use it as a laptop
- can't use it as a key to unlock houses